January has always been the dumping ground for films and relationships. Which is why when I saw they were releasing BB3 at this time, that didn’t really instill confidence. I’d say the same amount of confidence Mets fan of having Diaz come in from in the bullpen. Anyway, let’s bring you up to speed. Marcus Burnett and Mike LAAAA-RHY are back in Miami and 25 years old than when they made their initial appearance. Will Smith barely looks any older while Martin Lawrence looks like he’s allergic to shellfish and just polished off 10 lobsters and then got stung by 10,000 bees. Marcus is a now grandfather and fully into Roger Murtagh, “I’m getting too old for this shit” territory. Marcus is ready to retire and Smith is not. Things change when the son of a Mexican drug lord shoots up Mike LAAAA-RHY because Mike and other public figures sent Papi to prison. Mike recovers and it’s vendetta time but not for Marcus, he’s in full Murtagh mode. THE PLOT THICKENS….
So what’s different with BB3 than the others? No Michael Bay at the helm but new directors Bilal Fallah and Adil El Arbi do not change the playbook when it comes to action choreography. Definitely see the slowed down 360 shot after a terse moment or 2 and fantastic cinematography as well. Joey Pantaliano (Ralphie Cakes) reprises his role as Captain Howard so you know a few, “Don’t break the rules and fuck me” speeches are coming. We also get the same ribbing back and forth between Smith and Lawrence which feels like those old, comfortable slippers that always put a smile on your face. And what Bad Boys film would be complete without Theresa Randle as Marcus’s wife giving him an earful. Seriously, you think she would divorce him by now or he would tell her cut the shit; he’ll never stop fucking up and the department will keep buying them new houses or cars whenever bad things happen to them. Women? AmIright?
What’s new? We also get a new team working with Mike and Marcus within the Miami PD, the AMMO squad. Vanessa Hudgens from High School Musical (never saw it, won’t bother) plays one of the squad and goshdarnit, she’s too damn cute to be shooting bad guys. And let’s cue in the old guy jokes by the other dudes in the task force. The creation of this task force beautifully sets ups the franchise for sequels or even a spinoff. But don’t get cute with the spinoff idea, this group doesn’t have the charisma or humor to get people to drop $15 without Smith or Lawrence as the driving forces.
I liked Bad Boys but felt #2 dragged on. This one was solid; top level action and had a John Wick feel to the fight scenes to it. A couple of twists including a BIG one. The soundtrack wasn’t as good as the first 2 but that’s because hip hop music has gone down the shitter in the last 10 years. Example? There are TWO Black Eyed Peas songs in here.
One more fun observation. DJ Khaled has a scene where he plays a butcher and Mike has a few questions for him. Mike uses a meat hammer on his hand to get some answers. I feel Mike should’ve smashed his hand a final time while saying, “This is for your shitty music, ANOTHER ONE.” Now that kids, is a smart, well-written joke. You better fucking acknowledge greatness when you see it.
Bad Boys For Life:
7 out of 10. What you gonna do? Turn your brain off and enjoy shit blowing up for 2 hours.
Kevin Gootee 