Last week 2-3-1 after Den and the Browns didn’t show up. The Titans gave that game away and the Jets fucked me to a push as Fitzpatrick went Fitzpatrick. Clean slate now, let’s do this!
Well, not so clean slate. I took Cle over last week and Flacco and the Cle QBs fucked me but good so I missed that one. So, starting the week 0-1.
Drew Brees is home and facing a Den offense that couldn’t score against the Raiders. The Raiders? That defense is putrid. Also will mention Derrick Wolfe and both Den CBs are out. Denver can’t stop the run and if Ingram doesn’t fumble, they can run the ball down their throats. Did I mention Drew Brees is home?
I’m taking the Saints -3
The Jets are home with a Bryce Petty at QB and the Rams come to town. Both teams score less than white men with Khloe Kardashian. This reeks of 17-13. The under is 39 which means VERY little wriggle room but I just don’t see the scoreboard lighting up unless there is a power surge.
I’m taking the under 39.
Carolina is home against a beleaguered Chiefs who is without Maclin and Justin Houston on defense. Bet the Chiefs at home, don’t touch them on the road. Carolina is making a mini run and 3 points isn’t too much to ask for but then again, people who took Carolina said that last week as they got backdoor pushed.
I’m taking Carolina -3
I cannot see Pittsburgh losing this week. I don’t care Dallas is hotter than Donald Trump’s daughter. (I’d make her a mix tape, that’s how hot she is). Pitt had a rough week last week but Ben will be ready to roll. They’re home, the line is only a FG, and I think the Black and Yellow squad stop those dildos from Dallas. Dallas is due for a loss and here it is.
I’m taking Pittsburgh -3
San Diego has done nothing but cover spreads as an underdog. I just don’t know if Miami is going to through a monkey wrench on their “home field advantage.” SD doesn’t handle success well but here’s what I do know, SD puts up points. And Miami could put up some points as well so what does that mean? That’s right, enjoy watching both teams score points. Jarvis Landry is probably playing as Hunter Henry and Tyrell Williams. Travis Benjamin is doubtful but I think points can be scored.
I’m taking the over 49.
I hate the Patriots but goddamn, they’ve made me a ton of cash. I took Brady in 2 leagues and waited out the suspension so I look like a genius. Pats are off the bye and at home against Seattle. Buffalo came into Seattle and scored more than everyone thought would. Seattle’s D isn’t what it used to be. Flying across country after playing a monday night game and going into New England is about as fun as watching Hillary fake laugh her way through a speech. Dion Lewis is back as well so more weapons for Tom the Trump supporter to play with. Bellichek is >60% ATS at home and I plan on riding that money train into the sunset.
I’m taking NE -7.5