The day all eyes (except communists) are turned to the TV, Superbowl Sunday! Denver! Carolina! Cam and the race baiters vs Peyton and the feel good karma. What say you? Before we get to the picks, I wanted to say that I created a damn good video (with my daughter) that refuses to upload so you get the article instead. Thanks Obama.
Carolina -5.5 over/under 44
A little breakdown, why not? Carolina has the MVP Cam Newton, Greg (the leg, look it up ladies and alternative lifestyle living men) Olsen, and Jonathan Olsen on offense. Luke Keuchly and Josh Norman head up a ball hawk defense that pull in more sixes than my buddies do during a night out at the bar. Denver has old man Manning (great name for a Scooby Doo villain), Denaryius Thomas and his jailbird mother, Aqib Talib, and Danny Trevathan head up the #1 defense in the NFL.
The early money was on Carolina, driving it from an opening line of -3.5 up to 6. The public drove that line up faster than Hillary Clinton polarizes an audience. The whales that fly into Vegas the night before started to dump money on the Broncos, dropping it to down to 5, and now it went back up to 5.5 The over/under opened at 45.5 and now it’s dropped down to 44. Translation: everyone thinks this will be a low scoring event. Now, if you think Carolina is going to win, it will be in a blowout fashion with the over easily achieved. If you think Denver is going to win, you probably think it will be a 21-17 type game. What’s my pick???
Denver +5.5
I know, I was huge on Carolina after they dismantled my Super Bowl pick, the Cardinals. Here’s why I’m going with Denver.
A) EVERYONE will want Denver to win; it’s the quintessential feel good story. Peyton’s done, let him go out on the highest note…unless you’re watching the games at home and you’re sick of those goddamn Nationwide/Papa John’s commercials and hoping Peyton gets runs over by a driver with no insurance while eating that awful pizza.
B) The weather is currently 63 degrees which helps Peyton immensely. But Kevin, he played in 50 degree weather against the Seahawks 2 years ago in the Superbowl. Yeah but the Carolina D is not the Seahawks team from 2 years ago.
C) The Broncos are looking to grind out the clock and that’s what they did against the Pats. They can’t keep up in a shootout so look for a lot of running and quick passes.
D) Carolina is notorious for putting up big leads but then giving up the late back door cover. If Denver does go down by a lot quickly, Carolina will go into soft coverage and probably let some points score. And remember, Denver doesn’t have to win, just cover.
E) And I saved my best point for last: Carolina has ALREADY planned their victory parade. The kiss of death…only bad things can happen when you do that.
I’m still scratching my head with the over/under and I haven’t put a wager down yet or may not even do so. I’m waiting for the line to move BUT if I had to pick one now, I’m taking…
The over 44
Superbowls are primarily overs and I think more points will be scored, more like 24-21. There is LITTLE room for the under and I haven’t seen many recent superbowls, sans my NY Giants vs the Pats, where the under hits.
Prop bets
Number of times Kevin refills his beverage when Coldplay is playing
3.5
OVER
Number of times Kevin yells at the TV, “HOW THE FUCK IS COLDPLAY DOING THE HALFTIME SHOW! I DON’T KNOW ANYONE WHO OWNS ONE OF THEIR ALBUMS?”
19
OVER
Number of times Kevin wonders aloud why Beyonce married Jay Z when she has plenty of her own money yet her husband looks like a sad catfish.
3
Under, I’m just restating the obvious
Number of minutes Kevin watches the halftime show
5
Under. I’d rather spend time openly mocking my friend who is a Cowboys fan.
Kevin Gootee 