Conference Championship picks against the spread. NFL ATS

Not a stellar last week, 2-3, making me 5-5 for the playoffs which is my worst playoff stretch in recent memory.

 

Ne-3 and 44.5

Brady vs. Manning, again and probably for the last time.  Folks, I dare you to find a stat that tips you one way or the other.  The Pats ATS are not convincing (7-6-3) and Brady in Denver is 2-6.  Pats have also given up a TON of late 4th quarter TDs to fuck up the spread.  Now, before you rush to take Den, here are a few stats against Den.  Denver SUCKS ATS at home (3-5 but 8-6-2 overall).  Now, those numbers reflect both Peyton and  Ossweiler (not playing).  So this game is definitely a head scratcher.  Does Brady shake off the curse in Denver?  Can Peyton Manning make it back to the big one for last time?  Will Comics Watching Comics (@comicswatching) get picked up by a network in the near future?  All excellent questions and I have answers to none of them.  

The answers I have are to: A) Is Bridge of Spies a good film.  Answer: no, Spielberg and Hanks pair for a rare miss.  This was boring, how does this get an oscar nom but Hateful 8 or Straight Outta Compton get snubbed?  B) What are your picks for Chrissakes?  Well, I’m taking….

 

Under 44.5  Den D is still solid, you can bank on that.  Peyton threw a ball like he was auditioning for Glee, yet they still won.  No TDs for Peyton last week against a WEAK Pittsburgh secondary.  The numbers are against Brady in this one too so I’m thinking 17-14.  Gun to my head to pick a team and IF the line goes up to 3.5, I’ll take Denver.  The rule of thumb is when in doubt, take the points and especially to a home underdog.  I’m pulling for Denver because like any good American with common sense, I hate the fucking Patriots and their fans should be locked into a burning building.  Anyone want to hire Great White to play a show up in Boston???

 

Carolina -3 and 47.5

Anyone else have Carolina laying the 7 and felt like a million bucks during the first half?  Me too.  Anyone else feel shivers up their buttholes the entire second half while Seattle scored at will and Carolina played defense like the NY Giants have all year?  Me too.  Carolina refuses to give teams the FATALITY, they let them hang around and make things verrry interesting.  Arizona looked like dogshit last week against GB, fucking me on them as well as the over.  Carson Palmer looked more like Carson Daly last week, sans 3 plays.  Man, either that finger was more bothersome than he’s letting on or he’s doing his best A-Rod postseason impression.  Stats?  No problem and again, good luck finding one that you can hang your hat on.  Carolina ATS 11-5 overall and 6-2 at home.  Arizona is NAWWWNE and 7 ATS BUT 6-2 on the road.  What does that mean?  Means it’s time for some chocolate chip ice cream with waffle cone in it.

Ok, I’m back.  A little Hershey’s syrup makes everything good, right?  If you’re into “salad tossing”, you may want to add that to your condiment checklist.  So, what do those numbers mean?  Means this game is a tossup, hence the typical Vegas line of the home team -3.  Carolina might have received some respect last week after the first half but lost all their swag during half number 2.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…

ARIZONA IS WINNING THE SUPERBOWL.  

Arizona +3

So I’m taking the 3 points and expecting either an AZ win or a garbage time TD to get me the backdoor cover.

I didn’t lock in yet but I want to see how the line moves and I’ll probably end up taking the Over at 47.5.  

 

 

 

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